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Lukas Carlson // reborn

by Lorin Drexler · Jul 13, 2020

Lukas Carlson – Featured Artist

reborn

i never intended to be
this thing that i have become
but i suppose no one ever does
i tried hard to keep it
together but the harder
i tried the more 
loose lengthy flaccid
i'd become
 
i suck in my breath and wish
once again for that thing…
that remarkable thing that people have
that wondrous vim
embodied by those i admire so
those infectious laughs
like tear gas over a mob
that protest for more
 
i know it’s how i think
but what am i to do—
it’s how i think
if we survive this day
the people will think again
 
i look in the mirror and
smile as i cry and smile again
always smiling
the tears skid like gradeschoolers 
everyone continuously telling
the same bad lie 
everyday 
all day
and i knowlingly lie right back
stoic little fireflies
rambling in prescriptions
and melted cheese
cows pasturing
like vending machines
 
and
as i finger-paint my face like some
probationary escort i otherwise pretend…
it’s my self-portrait and i am preparing
for my big debut, beret and all
and as i go on pretending
readjusting the 9mm 
chaffing my lower back
i wonder if this really is my 
moment of revival 
 
maybe i've finally
taken a turn for the worse
sometimes i feel like i am fading
filled with mutations
i hear the kids outside
screaming with excitement
it sounds like hyenas
ripping an elk
i’m not sure if that’s what hyenas
kill, but again, what am i to do—
it’s how i think
 
i can’t tell where the world begins
and i end
it’s all blending together
like thick unfinished brushstrokes
pulsing out a birth canal
colors coalescing into soft mixtures
of ice and flame
symbols of death and the amnion
slowly evaporating into
dead-end flumes
 
it was once so defined
so perfect and bright
a lost star in an
uninspired galaxy
burning its way through
life like a paralytic
dream of one day

one should be so lucky
to be alive at all
one should be but… 
i take a deep breath
and reach my arm
to the mirror 
kissing it with my hand
and letting it drag
its way down and off
 
i kiss and kiss again
smile as i cry
always smiling—
there is a choice
and i have made mine
in this moment
upon my exit
where all my actions are pure
and will be very well
misunderstood
 
by LORIN DREXLER


Lukas Carlson

http://lukascarlson.com/

Lukas Carlson graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire in 2017 with a BFA in Illustration. Primarily a painter, his work explores the human figure while studying behavior and emotion. Linear concepts are avoided, and he prefers to be inspired by the complexity of simple forms. His current inspiration involves considering the human figure as a structure that can be disassembled and reconstructed in different ways.


What is Gen Society?

Gen Society is an art space blog for visual art and creative writing collaborations, and other randomizations. Hosted by writer and musician Lorin Drexler, this online venue is an expressive experience for those interested in the world of the arts. It is a literary journey through the hearts and minds of contemporary artists in practice and a reflection of those that have long passed.

If you’re an artist and would like to submit your work in consideration to collaborate with Gen Society, please click below:

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